Life at 707

What makes a good father?

18 Oct 2009 Leave a Comment

by thepaleone in family, james, kids, life, Uncategorized Tags: Father, james

I found this old blog I had written quite a few years ago, Zaynah must have  still been in diapers! Anyways I thought I would re-post it here since it still rings true today. Just don’t tell James because he doesn’t like it when I get all mushy on him!  

When you think about it what really makes a good father? How does a man learn how to become one? Is it taught to him by his father, if he has a bad father is he pre-destined to be a bad father to his children as well? There is so much negative press given to those fathers who don’t do right, those who neglect to pay their child support or just leave the mother hanging to raise a child by themselves. But hardly any attention is given to those fathers that do stick around, those who raise the kids by themselves or just make sure everything is taken care of. One of the reasons I love my husband so much is that he is a great father, and if you knew him and a little of his personal history you would wonder, how did this come about? While I consider my self a good mother, I had a great role model; my mom went above and beyond the call of duty to make sure we had a roof over our heads and food in out stomach even if it meant having to work two jobs and not spending quality time with her kids. I really didn’t appreciate the sacrifice she made until I became a mother myself. My husband on the other hand was not as fortunate to have a good father role model although he has two men to sit in the father role in his life. Without going to deep into it lets just say one rather chooses another lifestyle over a life with his kids, and the other was emotional distance to say the least. But James has taken on the role of father head on. He is the disciplinary in our home, (I am a little chicken about that), and is a great role model in showing the kids how things are to be done, he great at telling the to suck it up and move on when they fall or don’t do as well as they want ( this is a very valuable life lesson in itself), he shows the kids how a man should treat a woman, and shows Shayla (and one day Zaynah) how they should expect to be treated when they grow up. James is not above washes dishes or changing diapers or even cooking, in fact I think he rather cook then eat what I come up with sometimes! He spends time with the kids, not afraid to be left alone with them, takes them fishing and shares his interest and hobbies with them. The kids are lucky to have him and so am I. So where did this come from? Did he learn it, from what I see as role models around him no? Was it inherited, don’t think so. I believe it is just a true test to the type of man my husband is. When he sets his mind to something he goes at it with all he’s got. He has an incredible ability to learn for others mistakes and decide his kids deserve better than what he had for a father growing up. Shayla, Tai, Zaynah and I love and adore him, and our world is a better place because of him.